Friday, March 7, 2014

When Changing Everything is Easier than Changing Something

I am about half way along this second stage of fatherhood. The Koalid is coming out in about four and a half months. Ordinarily, having a first child would be a dramatic life change. If it were a matter of staying in the same apartment, working the same jobs, and doing the same things but making the adjustments that a child requires, that would be quite a thing.

What happens, when everything else changes at the same time? Amy started a new job a few weeks ago. I left the car dealership in December, just ahead of a complete collapse of their business. Due to the new situation, we have to move. Does the tumultuous situation around us make it harder, or does it make it easier? After all, isn't it, in some ways, easier to accommodate one change when you are already making many other changes?

I left a certain dealership just before their sales took a
dive of over 50%. For the record, their cars are still neat and
well maintained and clean. They just aren't selling many.
It is certainly true, that many changes that would have to be made for a baby have to made for other reasons as well. We live in a one bedroom apartment, so we would have to move anyway. So now, rather than move down the street to a two bedroom, we move down the shoreline to another two bedroom.

In some ways, the end of my job in December is quite fortuitous. With my salesman's schedule and Amy's full time schedule, we would have needed full time day care. A very expensive proposition where we exchange a great deal of money for the privilege of having someone else raise our child in whatever way they see fit.

I have always been a bit of an entrepreneur. Started a business right out of college. I've always had a project or two brewing on the side. However, since my first effort at full time entrepreneurship, I have never been in a position to give it my full attention until now. Now, suddenly, the math changes. If I would be paying 40-60% of my income to daycare, that means that if I could make 60-40% of my normal income and take care of the Koalid myself, then we are in the same financial position while knowing that the caretaker is one that I can trust. (At least I hope I can trust myself.)

Back up plan, in case the Koalid
ever has to come in to work with me.

Many men in my position have great fear and trepidation about how they will figure everything out. How will they adapt to this one new thing in their life. For me, when everything is different, when I'm making everything up from whole cloth, I find that I have one choice: the choice I have been making since Fall of 2012 that has gotten me this far. I can accept God's plan, have faith that the way will be made clear for me, and hold on tight for an amazing ride.

No comments:

Post a Comment